WWE Commercials
by ThrashMetalQueen
Summary: COMPLETE! If you ever having a bad day, bored or just want to read something completley random, here are some oneshots and drabbles that might cheer you up.
1. Chapter 1: The Ultimate Test :: Randy

**WWE Commercials**

_By: Miss Xtreme_

**Disclaimer: I only own Caria, Trixy, Felicia, & Italia (As well as Ayden). Any other OC belongs to their rightful owner.**

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**Chapter One: The Ultimate Test**

**A/N: Okay so these are basically little one-shots and drabbles. I was inspired by Animal-luver to do these. Hopefully you'll find these funny and/or amusing. This first one is about Randy Orton. A little bashing goes on, so if you don't like it – don't read.**

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The St. Louis native flipped through the pages of a dirty magazine. A smirk lied on his face as his eyes fixed upon the female figures.

"Ooh!" he snickered mischievously. He licked his lips lustfully wanting to feed his sexual hunger. But then, as he got to the end, he closed the glossy item. Randy sighed unsatisfied. He took a moment to think and then threw the magazine up in the air carelessly.

Walking away he said to himself. "Nope, still gay."


	2. Chapter 2: Lessons of Beer :: Rey

**Chapter Two: Lessons of Beer**

_A Rey Mysterio story_

In the classroom of fifteen students, Senor Mysterio taught his young minds about the lessons of Bud Light.

"Now, what do we say when someone gives us a free Bud Light?" he asked them.

"Muchas gracias senor." replied the class in unison.

"Or…?" Rey said reminding them of another word to replace senor.

"Senora or Senorita." they answered him.

"And if someone asks us if we can have a Bud Light?" Rey questioned the group.

They all shrugged in a clueless fashion. "Mi no speak english!"


	3. Chapter 3: Beware of Ghosts ::Eugene

**Chapter Three: Beware of Ghosts**

_A Eugene Story_

It's a hot summer day. Three men (Triple H, Chris Jericho, and Shawn Michaels) along with two ladies (Stephanie McMahon and Melina Perez) are lying on the beach of the Caribbean relaxed in their lawn chairs.

By each of them are Corona Lights tucked inside of the drink pockets of their chairs. Suddenly, a mysterious shadow creeps up the hill of sand sneaking up on them. Nobody realizes it.

Is it a killer?

A peeping tom-like stranger?

A passing soul?

But then as the figures sat up to alert, Melina shrieked in absolute horror.

It was pale. It was geeky. It was scrawny.

It was… Eugene.


	4. Chapter 4: I See The Light! :: Horny

**Chapter Four: I See The Light!**

_A Hornswoggle story_

Kennedy set a big, brown crate onto the table. A voice is heard inside grabbing away. Curious, he opened it up and a blonde Irish midget pops out. Across from Kennedy, Dave Finlay stands there just watching.

"I see the light! Who out there wants to be healed?" the midget named Hornswoggle asks out loud searching the open area for a volunteer. He looks at Kennedy "You young man! Bring me that _hideous _face of yours!

He lays his small hands upon The Green Bay native's face and chants a few words. Then he says exclaiming "Let the evil acne be gone! (Hornswoggle smacks the other blonde in the forehead as hard as he can) BAM!"

"Oww!" Kennedy says holding his head. Then out of no where, a lightning bolt strikes him.

Hornswoggle throws his hands up in the air for joy. "Praise Oxy!"


	5. Chapter 5: What The Hell? :: Cena

**Chapter Five: What The Hell?**

_A John Cena Story_

John Cena flushed the toilet of the stall he was in and unlocks the door. Walking out, he turns the knob to one of the faucets and begins to wash his hands. He looks down trying to pay attention to scrubbing every little detail away. Unknowing, a horse passes him out the bathroom door. Confused and slightly disturbed, John looks up; but sees nothing at all. Was it just his imagination?


	6. Chapter 6: Real Name :: W Regal

**Chapter Six: Real Name**

_A William Regal Story_

Entering through the door of his home, the British male William Regal steps into his foyer.

"Mr. Barkey-Von-Schnauzer?" he called to his pet dog.

No response.

"Mr. Barkey-Von Schnauzer?" William repeated again.

Still, his dog would not come. Apparently, Mr. Regal should of named his pet something he actually liked.


	7. Chapter Seven: Scoring Hotties ::PL & BK

**Chapter Seven: Scoring A Hottie**

_A Paul And Brian Story_

In a book store, two best friends were reading a book called "How To Score A Hottie"

"Dude, we can so use this in college." the blonde, younger male named Brian said snickering.

Paul London nodded in agreement with a smirk on his face. "Totally."

"Paul?" said a feminine voice. Paul and Brian looked up to see Maria Kanellis standing in front of them.

"What're you reading?" she asked curious.

An awkward moment came up and Paul freaked. Brian just stood there looking over at Paul with a big smile on his face. Paul took out a Twix bar and chewed it quickly looking for a response. A thought popped inside his mind and he took it in action. "Dude, how can you read this? SO juvienille."

"Oh." Maria said in relief that he wasn't playing a part in that. "You want to grab a coffee or something?"

Paul nodded and smiled. "Sure.

As the two left, Brian just stood there dumfounded.


	8. Chapter 8: Cheer or Cry? ::Kane & BS

**Chapter Eight: Cheer or Cry?**

_A Kane And Big Show Story_

A bald figure in black tights with red, barbwire-like prints on came from a gas station. In his hand, he held a candy bar.

His name was Kane. He walked over to his friend who was checking the price of the gas that he just pumped into the car.

"Hey I couldn't find any regular Snickers in there." Kane told Big Show.

"NO!!!!!" cried the larger man in anger and aggression.

By the gas pumps were two trash cans. Big Show picked up on and threw it in anger at a neighboring car.

Kane continued on with his sentence. "But I did find dark chocolate Snickers."

Yet again, Big Show picked up another trash can and threw it at the same car. On the exact same spot.

"YEAH!!!!!!" he shouted in a happy way. Happy, yet strange.


	9. Chapter 9: Some Warning :: Vince

**Chapter Nine: Some Warning**

_A Vince McMahon Story_

Over dozens of WWE Superstars sat in a bar chatting away, drinking beer, or eating. Suddenly the television screens started flashing the word 'BOSS' and making the alerting sound informing them all that HE was coming. Everybody started running frantically. Kane hid in the toy machine that had the bouncy balls, most of them dashed behind the bar, and Rory and Robby hid in the fridge.

The Billionaire Chairman power-walked inside looking in there was any of his employees. He waited for a minute to see if any would accidentally pop out, be no one did. So he gave up and exited the building. Above Vince was Jeff Hardy, his wife Caria Hardy, Jamie Valentine and even his own daughter Nirvana McMahon! They were hanging by the bar on the ceiling. As soon as it was cleared, they climbed down, along with the others revealing themselves.

But then ten minutes later, the screens flashed again saying 'HUNTER'S ANGRY WIFE'. Triple H pulled down the beer lever on the table and the chair he was sitting on, lowered him down below the ground.


	10. Chapter 10: FEAST :: DX

**Chapter Ten: FEAST**

_A DX Story_

Shawn Michaels held up a candy bar in the air. "Behold Snickers – the feast!"

Triple H took a horn and blew a victory toot, but then he knocked into Shawn as he raised his horn up. The Snickers that was in Shawn's hands fell to the ground.

The younger male gasped. "The feast!! ….. It is ruined."

Triple H took the horn and blew a pathetic toot signalizing loss.


	11. Chapter 11: Blonde :: Kelly Kelly

**Chapter Eleven: Blonde**

_A Kelly-Kelly Story_

Torrie came into the kitchen of her house as two of her friends, Kelly and Michelle McCool sat at the table.

"Hey guys, I just brought back food from Burger King." she told them as she handed out the items from the brown paper bag. They thanksed her and began to unwrap their burgers. As soon as they began to eat, a mustache started to form on their faces. Torrie's was bleach blonde like her hair, Michelle's was dirty blonde, but Kelly's was strangely brown.

Michelle screamed. "You're not a real blonde?!"

Kelly just merely shrugged.


	12. Chapter 12: China :: Shannon

**Chapter Twelve: China**

_A Shannon Moore Story_

"Okay, so the packages on the right are going to be shipped to China instead of Japan." said the Fed-Ex boss.

Shannon nodded. "Right."

He stuck a thumb tack into the map on the wall. Though, it wasn't the right place that it was suppose to be in.

"Uh Shannon, that's not China." the boss told them. "That's Germany."

Shannon didn't respond, mostly out of embarassment. He just took the tack back out and put it in another place.

"That's... Austrailia... Shannon." the older male corrected him. "You don't you where China _is. _Do you?"

Then, just to play like an accident, the blonde pretened to fall and bring the map with him, causing it to rip completley.


	13. Chapter 13: BFF Rose? :: Caria

**Chapter Thirteen: BFF Rose?**

_A Caria Story_

"Alright, listen up everyone. We have all got to start saving up our money. So we're going to do less texting on our phones right?" Caria asked her family.

"Right." said her husband Jeff.

"Ditto." said her son Tyler.

Then she heard beeping of a phone and turned around suspiciously.

Caria gasped at the sight of who was doing it. "Mother! Who could _you _possibly be texting?"

Her mom shrugged. "IDK, my BFF Rose?"


	14. Chapter 14: Knife :: Beth Phoenix

**Chapter Fourteen: Knife**

_A Beth Phoenix story_

People ran frantically through an office building.

"Run everyone!! BETH'S GOT A KNIFE!!!" someone screamed.

Shawn Michaels courageously approached her desk. "Beth, tell me the truth, why do you have a knife?"

The blonde looked at him like he was an absolute moron. "I'm eating my lunch which _requires _one."

He sighed in relief. Shawn looked at over to the other employees who were hiding behind their desks. "She's just eating her lunch people."


	15. Chapter 15: The World :: Miz

**Chapter Fifteen: The World **

_A Miz Story_

**A/N: I'm putting in my other friend's OC in here. You'll like her, trust me. Oh, and I might screw up the song that's in here, but you'll get the point. xD And if you don't know who some of these people are, I suggest you go back to the first chapter and read the disclaimer. Like Caria, she's my OC.**

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The blonde male known as Mike Mizanin sat at one of the lunch tables eating a Snickers bar.

A woman named Pandora came up to him with a guitar and asked him. "Can I help you enjoy that?"

With, or without his premisson, she began to strums the strings and start singing. "Happy peanuts gone over chocolate-covered moutain tops of waterfalls of caramel, prancing joyfully singing songs of satisfaction to the wooooooorld!"

She stopped and looked at him. Mike stared at his snickers bar. "The WORLD..."


	16. Chapter 16: Mother :: Linda

**Chapter Sixteen: Mother**

_A Linda Story_

Linda McMahon tore open a envelope to reveal a card inside. She smiled, she knew who it was from. Only her darling son Shane. Opening it up, Linda read the message inside.

"Mom,

I just wanted to say thank you for everything. You've been there for me when I was little. You helped me when I was down and I just appreciate everything you've done for me. By the way, I have great news; I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by switching to Geico."

She put the card to her heart. Such a sweet message.


	17. Chapter 17: Busy Bee :: Santino

**Chapter Seventeen: Busy Bee**

_A Santino Story_

"Working hard here! Working hard!" exclaimed the Italian rookie as he sat inside the hall. Strangely, he did nothing but stare out into the hall.

Melina Perez approached Hunter Helmsley and his wife Stephanie McMahon as they watched Santino as well. Every time a person would pass, he would shout out something. The last one to do so was Jeff Hardy.

"I'm doing lots of work! I'm working!!"

Jeff peaked in and gave him a weird look, then walked away.

"What's up with Santino?" Melina asked the two of them.

"We have no idea, but I think he's used to being slammed with things to do." Stephanie said. "May be that's why he's yelling out stuff."

Carlito walked by. And Santino did it again. "Work! Work! Work!"

"He sure is a weird one though…" Hunter said.

"Agreed." Melina replied.

Shannon Moore came and Santino yelled. "Busy bee!!"

"Yep." Stephanie followed.


	18. Chapter 18: They Miss You :: Ken

**Chapter Eighteen: They Miss You**

_A Mr. Kennedy Story_

The blonde Greenbay native rubbed his eyes tiredly and yawned. He could barely pay any attention to what he was doing.

A beaver and what looked-to-be Abraham Lincoln sat down in front of his desk.

"Oh man, it looks like you haven't slept in ages." said the beaver.

"Ugh, tell me about it…" Kennedy groaned.

"Insomnia giving you trouble again?" Abraham asked.

"Yeah, but I've been so busy with everything." Kennedy said. "I can't really call anyone to help me out."

"But if it gets worse, you'll never get to sleep." the beaver warned him.

"I know…" Kennedy said in a guilty way.

The ninja that was watering his flowers banged his hand on the phone multiple times over to tell him to call.

Kennedy tried pushing him off. "Alright! Okay, I'll do it…"

His dreams definitely missed him.


	19. Chapter 19: SOS :: Stephanie

**Chapter Nineteen: SOS**

"What do you think it is?" Lita asked her husband. The two of them were standing on the other side of the street as they watched lights flash from a house across.

"I don't know." Shawn replied. "Do you think it could be SOS?"

She blinked. "I... don't know..."

Inside of the house where the message was coming from, it was curtains moving back and fourth repeatitively. Stephanie McMahon was in there smelling the scent of it as it came her way everytime.


	20. Chapter 20: Football :: Ken & Kelly

**Chapter Twenty: Football**

_A Kennedy-Kennedy And Kelly-Kelly Story_

**A/N: If there's any specific commercials you wanna see in this, let me know!**

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In the house of the Anderson residence, the husband Kennedy was in the living room. The wife, Kelly was in the foyer.

"Honey, what do you think?" she asked him. Kelly had her back to him while analyzing the walls. "Should we paint the walls? I think they look so plain and boring."

As Kennedy sat on the couch, he was watching football on the television. There was a touch-down for his favorite team, so he cheered.

"Yes! YES!" the blonde male threw his hands up in the air.

"Really?" she said surprised. "I'm so glad you agree. Hmm, what about lime green? No, no _yellow_?"

As soon as one of the football players for the Packers fumbled the ball, the ref interfeered.

"Oh no, NO! Damn it!!" Kennedy exclaimed disappointedly.

Kelly frowned. "Aw, but I like that color. Okay, then. I'll go to Home Depot and see what I can get."

Kennedy got more into the game, focusing hard on the player's moves. "Okay, go, let's go. Alright."

"I'll see you in about a half hour." informed the petite woman.

One of the football superstars began running toward the touch-down.

"Go, go, go, go, go, go, go!!" he freaked.


	21. Chapter 21: Bouncy? Kelly & Balls

**Chapter Twenty-One: Bouncy?**

_A Kelly-Kelly & Balls Mahoney Story_

A blonde petite woman dressed in a bicker's outfit took off her helmet as she entered into her bathroom. Dressing down, she entered into her shower to bathe herself. Using her Patine shampoo, she got out and dried her hair and saw it became shiney and extra curly. Her boyfriend, Jonathan came in wearing the same outfit. As he took off his helmet, she passed him with a towel around her and handed him the shampoo. After a few minutes, he came out with shiney, curly hair as well.

"Wow, this stuff really works. Look at these curls." Jonathan said in amazement.

"I know, right?" Kelly agreed.


	22. Chapter 22: So Easy :: Batista

**Chapter Twenty-Two: So Easy**

_A Batista Story_

It was a normal day in Chicago's airport. Smackdown!'s own Heavyweight Champion was walking up a esculator to the second floor. On the wall, Dave Batista passed a poster of himself. Curious, he moved down the steps to take a better look at it. Seeing it, the Washington man noticed it was a Geico advertisement. In big, bold letters it said. "So Easy, An Animal Can Do It!"

Embarassed, he covered the side of his face and walked back up the esculator.


	23. Chapter 23: Shower :: Matt Hardy

**Chapter Twenty-Three: Shower**

_A Matt Hardy Story_

"So, we're looking to advance our shower. Can you do that for us?" asked Chris Irvine.

"Sure." the plumber, Matt replied. "I can get that done for ya in just a day.

"Great! Well the bathroom's back there." Trish pointed down the hallway of the house. "Just ask if you need anything."

"Will do ma'am. Thanks." the brunette male nodded.

Heading toward it, he closed the door and fixed it up to make it so there was all kinds of heads that hit every part of your body. But in order to make sure it worked, he had to test it out. So the Cameron native took off his clothes, climbed into the shower and turned on the focets. Warm, steamy water hit his skin making it very relaxing.

About thirty minute later, Matt came back out with his things and secured his pants back on.

"Well, you're showers done. Enjoy." he told them.

The couple just looked at one another weirdly.


	24. Chapter 24: DHR :: Punk & SM

**Chapter Twenty-Four: Double Hell Raiser**

_A Punk and Shannon Story_

As the blonde, North Carolina male sat on his couch, the door opened up. He turned to see who it was.

"Got your lunch for ya." his best friend Phil said handing him a bag of Taco Bell's.

"Sweet! Thanks man, I've been dying to eat this stuff all day." Shannon thanked him, gratefully.

"You're welcome." the blacknette nodded. "But guess what I got?"

"What?" the blonde asked.

Phil revealed a bag of his own. "Double Hell Raiser."

The brown, paper bag suddenly had lit on fire. Shannon flinched back out of surprise.


	25. Chapter 25: Germ Freak :: Edge

**Chapter Twenty-Five: Germ Freak**

_An Edge Story_

**A/N: I just kinda like guessed on this one a little bit. :/**

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On an airplane up in the air, a blonde Canadian by the name of Adam Copeland sat in his seat typing away at his laptop. A passenger near by had sneezed. Adam screamed in frantic, took out his disinfectant and sprayed obsessively around him.

"Sorry..." the passenger apologized.


	26. Chapter 26: Civilized :: Cody Rhodes

**Chapter Twenty-Six: Civilized**

_A Cody Rhodes Story_

In the deep, thick green trees of the forest, the wild and untamed humans roamed. Scientists in white coats spread through out the place with huge nets. They managed to capture one and brought him to their labrotory.

Weeks they spent teaching him the nessecay essentials of life. Such as speaking, reading, eating properly, shopping and other things. After a long period of time when he was trained to top degree, they gave him new clothes and shaved off his long beard. Along with that, they cut his long natty hair to a black, spikey look.

Letting him out into the open city, he pulled out a VISA card. Looking toward the buildings of New York, he tried thinking that may be it wasn't as civilized as he thought...


	27. Chapter 27: V8 :: Hulk & Funaki

**Chapter Twenty-Seven: V8**

_A Hulk And Funaki Story_

**A/N: This has to be thee most random chapter ever. EVER.**

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People were amazed at the skills the Japanese cooks were preforming. One, offered Hulk Hogan some of the food that he made. The blonde merely shook his hand in refusal.

"Ah, no thanks brother." Hulk declined.

The Japanese cook, Funaki threw up his knife in the air and bonked him on the forehead before catching the black handle of the knife again.


	28. Chapter 28: Creepy :: Triple H

**Chapter Twenty-Eight: Creepy**

_A Triple H Story_

**A/N: WWE will be holding the Draft after Wrestlemania. They are planning on totally shaking up the rosters. So expect some surprising results. And as well the Officials are planning on making the Major Brothers heels and Edge's tag team partners or whatever.**

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_"Please record your message after the tone."_

The sound of a beep alerted Hutner Levesque that he could speak.

"Hey Steph, last night was amazing. I really hope we can do it again." he said. "It would probably stregthen our relationship -- I mean no wait."

He wasn't satisfied with his result so he deleted it and recorded over it.

"Hey Steph, you uh... really smelled good last night...is that creepy?"

He started over.

"Yo! Steph-a-nie! What's up girly?"

Started over.

"Why AM I talking in SUCH A high voice?"

Started over.

But while he was talking once again, his friend Chris Irvine passed while Hunter did a little booty shake.

"You know, people have told me I am a great salsa dancer."


	29. Chapter 29: Sneak :: Sasha&Kane

**Chapter Twenty-Nine: Sneak**

_A Kane and Sasha Story_

**A/N: Sasha Jacobs is property of xXxSashaxKaneAndTakerxXx.**

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Upstairs, small feminine feet tip-toed down the steps. It was dark and quiet, Sasha dared not make a sound. She didn't want to wake her husband nor kids. She snuck toward the Christmas tree that was brightly lit up with colorful lights. Sasha picked up a small 'Kays' bag and peaked inside. But before she could reveal the treasured surprise, the lights were flipped on and Kane and their two children stood at the living room entrance.

Green eyes widened. She was busted.


	30. Chapter 30: Easy Button :: Bree&Matt

**Chapter Thirty: Easy Button**

_A Matt And Bree Story_

**A/N: Bree Chapman-Hardy belongs to Jamie-Skellington.**

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As Jeff Hardy was watching TV, a digital camera fell in his lap. In the kitchen, as Mama Chapman and her grandaughter Lilian were building a ginger bread house. A laptop dropped down and caused some of the white, whipped cream to splatter in their faces. Lilian lit up as she saw it.

"Sweet!" she cheered.

As Matt was outside trying to clear the gutters on the roof. A cell phone dropped out of the sky and knocked him down in the snow.

_"You have reached your destination." _said the phone.

In the house, Bree was searching every where for where the technology was coming from. She spotted in the baby's room, her youngest infant daughter was playing around with a red, easy button.

"Oh, I found it!" said Bree.


	31. Chapter 31: Wish List :: S & C

**Chapter Thirty One: Wish List**

_A Shannon and Caria Story_

**A/N: Caria belongs to me. Please review.**

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The young, Prescott native Caria Moore was in her garden watering some flowers when her dog OZ came running to her with a magazine rolled up in his mouth. Hazel eyes blinked as she beant down and took it from him. She unrolled it and flipped through the pages. The pictures displayed so many, incredible cars. Caria was very amazed as she scanned her eyes over it. Then, when she was satisfied she put it back the way it was and gave it to Oz.

Going into the house, the pooch trotted over to Shannon who was at his desk typing on his laptop. the blonde saw him, and took the magazine from him and looked through it as well.

Both Shannon and Caria knew what they were going to get each other for Christmas.


	32. Chapter 32: Good Idea :: Orton

**Chapter Thirty Two: Good Idea**

_A Orton And Maria Story_

In an office building, a petite red-headed woman sat at her desk typing away at her computer. He boyfriend Randy was in his office next to hers when his marker board started sneaking out. Randy spotted it and started to chase it to get it back, but the male ran into a open door while the board escaped.


	33. Chapter 33: Think Of That :: Edge

**Chapter Thirty-Two: Think Of That**

The Chairman's face was red with anger. "Why didn't you think of that?"

Upset and frustrated, after he was yelled at, Johnathan Coachman left Vince's office. He stormed over to William Regal's office window and banged on it with his fists.

"Why didn't YOU think of that!?!" he shouted.

Angry because of his actions, the Britishman pushed a button on his phone. It connected with another's phone. That person was Victoria.

"Why didn't you think of that!" William hollered.

Victoria got up out of her chair and headed to one of the other worker's cubicles. The firecracker yelled at the blonde male inside. "Why didn't you think of that?"

She ran away back to her office to let what she said sink into Adam's head.

On the way home, Adam looked at his dog who was in the passanger's seat.

"Why didn't you think of that?" he asked him.

_'I did think of that.' _the dog said telepathicly. _'It was on the way home remember?'_


	34. Chapter 34: Hint :: Cena & Torrie

**Chapter Thirty-Four: Hint**  
_A Cena And Torrie Story_

The West Newbury native was outside in the cold by his girlfriend's window. In the snow, he crafted with his fingers a picture of a car all detailed. When he spotted the young blonde, he quickly ran away before he was seen.

Torrie approached her window. She looked outside and saw a picture of a car in the snow. She smiled, she knew John did it to hint her. She knew what she was going to get him for Christmas.

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**  
A/N: I thought all the Jorrie fans would get a kick out of that.**


	35. Chapter 35: Decorate :: McMahons

**Chapter Thirty-Five: Decorate**  
_A McMahon Story_

Young, Shane McMahon say on the couch caught up in his video games that he was playing with on his GameBoy. His mother, Linda approached her son.

"Sweetie, can you take a moment to help your father decorate the house?" she requested of him.

The McMahons were getting ready for Christmas. There was boxes everywhere full of tree decorations and house ones as well.

"Okay." Shane obeyed. He picked up a container of air freshener and sprayed it into the air. After he was done, he went back to his video games.

Vince, trying to reach a high place, slipped off his ladder and fell on his back.

"I'm okay!"


	36. Chapter 36: Stranded :: Melina

**Chapter Thirty-Six: Stranded**  
_A Melina Story_

It was pouring rain by the buckets. A furious Melina Perez tried starting up her car. But after so long, it still wasn't working. It was a dark night and she was beginning to become paranoid. All she wanted to do was get home to her boyfriend Johnny.

Suddenly, she saw a person with a hockey mask on in the rear-view mirror. Melina freaked and squealed out of fright.

In the back, her ten-year-old son took it off and revealed himself. "Mom, can we hurry up? We're going to be late for the soccer game."

Melina manged to regain her breath. "I know honey, I'm trying to get there."


	37. Chapter 37: Perfect Tree :: HHH & Steph

**Chapter Thirty-Seven: Perfect Tree**  
_A Hunter And Steph Story_

"Yo Steph, I think I found it!"

The young brunette woman stepped back over to her husband. They were searching for a Christmas tree for their house Hunter managed to find one that he particuarly favored. He thought that she might agree also.

The McMahon nodded her head. "I like it."

He tapped her on the shoulder and whispered into her ear. "Oh, and I think Santa already might've left ya a present."

Stephanie blinked. She looked under the tree and saw a small 'Kays' bag. She smiled as she picked it up. She smooched Hunter on th cheek. "Tell him I said thank you."


	38. Chapter 38: Turkey? :: Lance Cade

**Chapter Thirty-Eight: Turkey?**  
_A Lance Cade Story_

The light blonde male stepped out onto the stange. There was barely anyone in the audience. Lance looked around an saw the ones that were there, weren't too happy. But he could make it better. He knew he could.

He tapped a finger onto the microphone and spread his wings and made a mating call like a turkey.

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**  
A/N: Yeah, I don't know either. I just saw this and was bored so I figured I'd add it to the collection.**


	39. Chapter 39: Sensitive :: Stevie

**Chapter Thirty-Nine: Sensitive**  
_A Stevie Richards Story_

Stevie Richardsis an actual Geico customer, not a paid actor.So to tell his story, we hired Joan Rivers, a celebrity.

"My father was held at knife point while he was in his car." Stevie started.

Joan took a hold of his han, trying to comfort him. "Oh honey, it's okay! I'm here for you, I'm here!"

"With all the sensitivity and care, Geico helped me fix that so he was safe and sound." the dirty blonde continued.

Joan leaned her head on his shoulder. "Oh, I'm so happy for you! I really am! Look, I'm smiling! (She felt her face) A-Am I smiling? Am I? I can't feel my face. Steve, am I smiling?"


	40. Chapter 40: Stop! :: Cena & Orton

**Chapter Forty: Stop!**  
_A Cena And Orton Story_

A man, by the name of Randy Keith Orton stepped aboard an airplane. In one hnd, he brought a rather large suitcase and carried a Dairy Queen milkshake in the other.

He placed his cup of sweet dessert in one of the holders where his seat was. By his chair, was another man by him that was sitting by the window. His name was John Cena.

As Randy was putting his suitcase inside a case above a woman, John eyed his milkshake. He took a quick scoop of it and ate some. Randy caught him and freaked out.

"Hey man, don't do that!" he complained.

But as the St. Louis native tried preventing him from eating it, his suitcase slipped and fell on the head of the blonde woman. Her name was Beth Phoenix.

"What the--? What is your problem man?!" cried Beth.

Randy apologize many times to her. He took his luggage andtried fitting it into the case again. The West Newbury man snuck another couple of bites again. Randy threw a coniption once more, trying to stop John from doing it again. The suitcase fell down upon the blonde's head again. She yelled at him again in complete frustration.

He tried setting his suitcase to fit snugly in there. John started eating more scoops of the milkshake, knowing Randy couldn't stop him.

The luggage fell on Randy, toppling him before he could rescue his dear dessert. "No, stop!!"


	41. Chapter 41: Doll :: Batista

**Chapter Forty-One: Doll  
**_A Batista Story_

"Here, why don't you try this?" said Stephanie McMahon, Dave's therapist. She haded Dave a plushie of a cave man.

He looked clueless to what she meant. "What do you mean?"

"Just talk to it." she instructed him.

"Talk to it?" Dave repeated.

"Yeah, try role-playing with it." Stephanie said.

He looked at her like a moron. Dave peered down at the doll. "Hello Mr. Cave... Dude, how are you? (He then took a moment of silence.) And he doesn't say anything... because he's a doll."

* * *

**A/N: I made that for my girly Animal-luver. Hope she likes. :)**


	42. Chapter 42: Trunk Monkey :: Jeff&Mickie

**Chapter Forty-Two: Trunk Monkey**

_A Jeff And Mickie Story_

"Well, here we are." said the Cameron male.

Mickie got more closer and comfortable next to Jeff. They were parked next to the tree as the sun began to set.

"Yeah... I still can't believe that my dad actually let us use the car." she said.

A stick was flung to the back of Jeff's head.

"Ow!" he winced, holding the place were the pain was inflicted. He looked and saw a monkey sitting in the back seat.

"Oh, I think it came with the car." said Mickie.

The monkey grabbed a shot gun.

Jeff freaked. "What the?!"

"Uh, that too..." the brunette said awkwardly.

Jeff ran out of the care quickly leaving Mickie with the monkey.


	43. Chapter 43: Pants :: HBK

**Chapter Forty-Three: Pants  
**_An HBK Story_

"I think we've gone all over the rules..." Matt Hardy, Shawn Michaels' new boss said. "Oh, but there's one thing."

"Yes?" Shawn paid attention.

"You can't wear pants here." Matt restricted him. He saw Shawn look at him strangely and very confused. "Well Michaels, this isn't an American business, it's European."

Many other workers were doing the same thing. Some were wearing boxers, others breifs. And for all the ladies, thongs. The Arizona man still didn't like the idea.

Matt shifted over to the side of the dirty blonde to whisper something. "Oh and did I forget to mention? There's Corona beers in the fridge."

That immediatly changed Shawn's mind completely. He saw the fridge full of alcohol with wide eyes. He quickly pulled down his pants.

"You've got'ch yourself a deal." he said heading over to it. After he cracked one open, he went back over to his boss. "What do you do on Casual Friday?"

Matt merely smiled. "Don't ask."

* * *

**A/N: My favorite chapter ever of this story. I love Shawn Michaels. XD**


	44. Chapter 44: Sounds :: HHH

**Chapter Forty-Four: Sounds  
**_A Triple H Story_

Hunter Leveque is an actual Geico customer, not a paid celebrity. So to tell his story, we hired Michael Winslow; the guy that makes all those funny noises.

"I had gotten into a car crash not too long ago." Hunter spoke.

Michael Winslow started off making gibberish sounds in chaos to make it sound like a car crash; in a funny way.

"But calling up Geico, I was able to fix all that." he continued.

Michael preteded to dial numers on a phone, then immitated a woman's voice talking on the other line.

"In ten, easy business hours, I got my check and was able to pay for a new car." said Hunter.

The other male sounded his voice like he was scribbling his signature on a check. Then he immitated hydrolics and scatching of a record.


	45. Chapter 45: Shmart :: Batista

**Chapter Forty-Five: Shmart  
**_A Batista Story_

"Why do you feel the way you do?" asked the therapist, Stephanie McMahon.

"_'So easy, an animal can do it'_?" Dave rephrased the company's quote. "I mean, come on! Why can't they use something else. Put your feet in my shoes."

"Well, that wouldn't make too much sense." Stephanie told him.

"Why not?!" the male demanded.

"Well, therapists are--" Stephanie was cut short, when he interrupted.

"--are what? Shmart?" Dave vented.

Silence broke for a moment. His cell phone began to ring. Dave looked at it.

"It's my mother." he told her. "I'll put it on speaker phone."


	46. Chapter 46: Box :: MVP & Trelane

**Chapter Forty-Six: Box**

_A MVP and Trelane Story_

A petite, ebony-haired woman pulled out a box of Multi-Grain cereal out of her cabnit.

"Oh, you're eating low-fat cereal now?" her boyfriend, Montel noticed.

"Yeah, but I did it because I like the taste better. Not because I need less of the carbs." said Amy. "Why, do you think I need to lose weight?"

Montel took the box and pointed out what he was talking about. "No, but I'm just saying the box has less sugar and fat and..."

Amy stared at him, trying to get her hint across.

"What else does the box say?" Amy asked him.

Montel understood. "'Shut up Montel.'"

She smiled in satisfaction as she ate a scoop of it. "Good boy."


	47. Chapter 47: Stuck :: Raven

**Chapter Forty-Seven: Stuck**

_A Raven Story_

A slender, red-head walked up to her husband as he was typing away on the computer.

"How's everything going?" Ariella asked him.

"I'm stuck." Ravne confessed. "I can't figure this out."

"Oh, don't worry, we'll just call up the people." Ariella said sarcastically, in a some-what mocking ton. "Oh, _that's right. _We didn't use people, we used the box. (she put a green container box in front of him) Tell the box you're stuck."

Raven looked down at it. "I'm stuck!"


	48. Chapter 48: Freak Out :: Kendrick

**Chapter Forty-Eight: Freak Out**

_A Brian Kendrick Story_

"Sir, this is clearly a Wendy's burger." said the cashier to Brian Kendrick.

"Clearly?!" said the blonde, out-raged. "I think it just might be! Listen, I don't eat at Wendy's. I don't like their food. Go back tehre and GET ME A WHOPPER!"

A man in a Burger King's mascot outfit came out with a plate that had a whopper on it. Brian got the hint that he was tricked and this was all a prank. He smiled.

Burger King's Whopper. Anything else is a freaking disappointment.


	49. Chapter 49: Interrupt :: DX

**Chapter Forty-Nine: Interrupt**

_A DX Story_

"I will not stand for this!" President Hunter Levesque declared. Cameras were flashing everyone. The Vice President, Shawn Michaels coughed some.

"This is a scandal!" Hunter exclaimed. The Vice President coughed again.

"This is an out rage!" Hunter exlcaimed again.

Shawn coughed a couple times more. He spoke into the microphone. "Sorry. Does anyone have a Recola?"


	50. Chapter 50: Number Five :: McCool

**Chapter Fifty: Number Five**

_A McCool Story_

**A/N: Yay! I'm half way there. I've got fifty more chapters to go until this'll be complete.**

**Oh, the reason why Triple H destroyed the screen on Monday, is because WWE is getting new sets. So might as well destroy all of them. All three rosters are going to look brand new.**

**And Big Show is coming back at the end of the month. But don't expect him to debut back at the Rumble.**

**Review.**

* * *

Michelle approached a fast food counter. "Can you tell me what's in your number five?"

"Bloated feeling, remorse, regret, loss of self esteem, broken heart, loss of boyfriend, self conciousness, goof ups, mess ups, feeling of worthlessness, fries and a shake!" the clerk chirpped.

Michelle took a minute to decide.

"Can I got that without the loss of self esteem?" Michelle requested.

"No cutom order!" a cook barked from the back.


	51. Chapter 51: Skittles :: Jeff Hardy

**Chapter Fifty-One: Skittles**

_A Jeff Hardy Story_

Maria and Shannon Moore approached Jeff Hardy while he say at his desk.

"Jeff, show Shan how everything you touch turns into skittles." Maria requested, holding out a stapler. Jeff said nothing and merely poked it. It popped into candy, scattering everywehre on the floor.

"That is so cool." Shannon said in amazement.

The other male nodded. His phone rang and as he was about to pick it up, it turned into skittles. In frustraion, he banged his fists on his desks and a huge pile of candy buried his lap.


	52. Chapter 52: Valentine :: Jericho&Trish

**Chapter Fifty-Two: Valentine**

_A Jericho & Trish Story_

"Well, another Valentine's Day." Chris Jericho stated.

"I got you something." his girlfriend, Trish Stratus replied. She hand him a card.

Chris took it and opened it up. _When It's Love _by Van Halen started playing.

He imagined himself on stage as Sammy Hagar. He was worshipped by the screaming fans. Lights were hitting down on him and he said beautifully to the rock love song.

Chris saw that one special lady, Trish, and pulled her up on stage.

The day-dreamed ended. The two looked at each other.

They charged at each other, passionately.


	53. Chapter 53: Anestesia On :: Jamie Noble

**Chapter Fifty-Three: Anestesia On**

_A Jamie Noble Story_

In an operating room, doctors and a nurse surrounded a man as they picked and fixed at his insides. Though, he wasn't asleep. He was awake and watching as they were working.

Jamie Noblewinced slightly, in pain. "Ow, I felt that."

One of the doctors blinked. "Oh, you did? Hold on."

And as the doctor tried fixing the problem, Jamie winced again.

"Ow!! Anestesia on!" he tried voice commanding it on. But not everything responds to your voice.


	54. Chapter 54: Relax :: Cody Rhodes

**Chapter Fifty-Four: Relax**

_A Cody Story_

**A/N: For Copeland-Runnels Inc.**

**Review.**

* * *

The teached of the class, Vince McMahon peered up at his body of students, worried. He did not want to do this.

A student, Cody Rhodes stood up corageously to Vince. He knew that his teached wasn't feeling so great about teaching.

"Sir," he spoke. "If it helps, just picture me naked."

Giggles and laughter spread throughout the students.


	55. Chapter 55: Cyber Love :: John Morrison

**Chapter Fifty-Five: Cyber Love**

_A Morrison Story_

As the young, Los Angeles native, John Morrison waled down the streets, he carried a lap top with him.

But this was no ordinary device, this one made John popular.All the girls that passed him, fell to his feet. Some were even kissing him, affectionately. Other people allowed him to go in front while he passed by. The ones up in the aparetments came to the windows to clap at his precense. Everyone worshipped him like God!

...All because...

...He was carrying a Dell!


	56. Chapter 56: Sexy? :: Candice Michelle

**Chapter Fifty-Six: Sexy?**

_A Candice Michelle Story_

**A/N: Bwahahahahaha. I love this chapter.**

**Review.**

**Bwaha. I win.**

* * *

A young woman named Candice Michelle walked down casually the streets of a city.

She was putrid, disgusting, and all around sickening to look at! She caked on pounds of make-up, was fat, and had a mole at the corner of her mouth. Candice also had a unibrow!

But men were falling to her unholy grace. They worshipped at her feet, treasuring the ground she walked on.

Why?

Nobody knew!

But her.

When she got home, she took out her Planter's peanuts, took a couple of them and rubbed them on her skin like perfume.

The answer was revealed.


	57. Chapter 57: Tiny Hands :: CM Punk

**Chapter Fifty-Seven: Tiny Hands**

_A CM Punk Story_

**A/N: I WIN AGAIN! HA HA HA-HA HA.**

**I hate CM Punk so freaking bad. He sucks. :D**

**Review.**

* * *

Two men were playing football in a yard. They went by the names of Kevin Thorn and CM Punk. But for short, he was only called 'Punk'.

"Hey, let's go to Burger King and take a five minute food break." Kevin suggested.

Punk looked back at the resturant that was across the street, then back at his freind.

"Ah, I don't t hink so. I got these tiny hands..." Punk took out his hands from his hoodie. "...And their Whopper is so big...It'll make them even tinier."

"Well," Kevin spoke. "I can hold it for ya."

Punk looked Kevin with some hope.


	58. Chapter 58:: Cloud Thing :: Cody Rhodes

**Chapter Fifty-Eight: Cloud Thing**

_A Cody Story_

**A/N: Again, for Copeland-Runnels Inc. **

**LMFAO.**

**Review.**

* * *

Cody Rhodes, the sun, took out a container of Jimmy Deans out of the microwave. He presented it to his friend, Harcore Holly, the cloud.

"See?" Cody said. "It's hot and delicious and it will fill you up nice and quick."

"But I like cereal." Holly replied, in a depressing tone. "It's cold and wet and plain."

Cody looked at him weird.

"It's a cloud thing." Holly answered him. "You wouldn't understand."


	59. Chapter 59: Hunger :: Vickie Guerrero

**Chapter Fifty-Nine: Hunger**

_A Vickie Story_

"Ding!"

The microwave had finished cooking the Hot Pockets that were inside.

Vickie took them out along with a plate from the cupboad. She put the Hot Pocket on the plate and put them both on the counter.

A small, female fist punched through the wall and seized the plate. Vickie gasped as she saw the hand take away the food.

The hand, just happened to belong to one of her daughters.

"Thanks mom!" the girl thanked her mother.

"You're welcome." Vickie said, still amazed.

Hunger eat what hunger want.


	60. Chapter 60: Again? :: Victoria

**Chapter Sixty: Again?**

_A Victoria Story_

Victoria scrunched up her nose at the food on her plate. Her friends sitting with her, hand the same expression.

"Ugh, burgers _again?_" the female complained.

Suddenly water fell down upon them, and their boring food, burned into delicious, Long John Silver's.


	61. Chapter 61: Number One :: EdgeHeads

**Chapter Sixty-One: Number One**

_A Edge-Heads Story_

**A/N: Remember, Zack Ryder used to be Brett Major and Curt Hawkins used to be Brian Major.**

**Review.**

* * *

Two men sat on a pier bench. Each was holding a burger. Both looked unsatisfied.

The first one, Curt Hawkins looked at the other male, Zack Ryder.

"Is that the number one?" Curt asked Zack.

Zack sighed. "Yeah. Is that the number five?"

Curt sighed, too. "Yeah."


	62. Chapter 62: Not Real :: Nunzio

**Chapter SixtyTwo: Not Real**

_A Nunzio Story_

"That'll be $5.20." said the cashier.

The male customer, Nunzio dug in his pocket and pulled out brightly-colored Monopoly dollar bills.

"I can't accept that." the cashier declined.

"Why no?" Nunzio asked, slightly irritated.

"Because it's not real money." the younger male chuckled. He didn't know if Nunzio was actually being serious, or if it was all a big joke.

Nunzio pointed at the tray of food. It consisted of a hash brown and an omelette McMuffin. "Well that's not a real breakfast! Real money, real breakfast, pal."


	63. Chapter 63: How Magical :: Kane

**Chapter Sixty-Three: How Magical**

_A Kane Story_

Kane and his date, Victoria sat at a table romantically under the moonlight. Everything seemed absolutely perfect, until Kane amazed her even more.

He blew onto the wick of both candles, and they were instantly lit. Victoria smiled widely at his work. But then Kane immediatly sneezed and a ball of fire came from his senses. Victoria backed off for safety.

"Do you have any cats?" he asked her.


	64. Chapter 64: Candy :: John Cena

**Chapter Sixty-Four: Candy**

_A Cena Story_

John Cena, the leader of the WWE took a handful of starburst and threw it into the crowd of the other wrestlers.

"My people love me..." he said, to himself. Then he unwrapped a star burst and popped it into his mouth. "And I love my... candy."


	65. Chapter 65: I'm Comfy :: Melina

**Chapter Sixty-Five: I'm Comfy**

_A Melina Story_

A young woman by the name of Melina walked down the sidewalk of a local park.

A loveseat stood on the sidelines of the sidewalk.

"Hey." it spoke.

Melina stopped in his tracks and looked strangely at the furnature.

"You heard me." it siad. "Come over her, sit with me. I'm soft and comfy. I'll make **all **your dreams come true."

The Latina smiled as she started climbing up and onto the loveseat.


	66. Chapter 66: The One :: Chavo Guerrero

**Chapter Sixty-Six: The One**

_A Chavo Story_

A line of criminals presented themselves in front of the police.

Chavo Guerrero pointed to the one that was guilty. "That's the one! He's it!!"

"That's the guy who fed you the mess of a breakfast?!" the Sheriff questioned him.

"Yes, _HE _did it!" Chavo exclaimed.

The Sheriff patted him comforting on the back. "Don't worry, he won't hurt you anymore."


	67. Chapter 67: Stop Pretending :: McMahon

**Chapter Sixty-Seven: Stop Pretending**

_A McMahon Story_

**A/N: I'm officially changing the ending to be 100 chapters. I'm loosing readers and reviewers. Sorry.**

**Review.**

* * *

A matured couple by the name of Vince and Linda McMahon approached a small lake with some ducks.

They took some bread crumbs and tossed it into the mouths of the birds.

The two of them cheered in victory, like they just had won a prize. But in reality, they won nothing.

Stop pretending, get to a real casino.


	68. Chapter 68: Make It :: Punk & Raven

**Chapter Sixty-Eight: Make It**

_A Punk And Raven Story_

Punk entered into the kitchen. His best friend Raven was in there with a bag full of Taco Bell.

"Hey," Raven greeted him. "I got you breakfast from Taco Bell."

"That's awesome." Punk said. "But you promised that you'd make breakfast today."

RAven took a frying pan from the stove and put one of the tacos inside it, still wrapped. He pretended to cook it while making a sizzling sound. He was trying to be sarcastic.

Punk rolled his eyes, taking it out. "Oh, you're _real _funny."


	69. Chapter 69: Excuse :: Miz

**Chapter Sixty-Nine: Excuse**

_A Miz Story_

A man named Miz with a blonde mohawk stepped out of his house, travelling over to his mail box. From the side of his eye, he spotted a beautiful, attractive, young woman plumber go over to his neighbor's house.

His eyes bugged. He needed an excuse for her to come over.

Miz raced into his house. He went into his bathroom and started grabbing some of the wash cloths. He tossed them into the tiolet.

He flushed it, expecting it to clog up. But to his surprise, it didn't. He tried throwing in toys and soap and all other things, but it didn't work.

So Miz started dumping in dog food into the tiolet. But as he was doing it, his wife Kelly walked in.


	70. Chapter 70: In Russia :: Punk

**Chapter Seventy: In Russia**

_A Punk Story_

**A/N: I changed my mind. WWE Commercials is ending here. I'm sorry.**

**And I love how TNA stole the whole handcuff idea from WWE. And also, they released Judas. Way to go, TNA. If it wasn't for Christian, MCMG, ODB and Christian, I wouldn't watch them at all, because they suck.**

**Oh, and what the fuck? The **_**drinking **_**championship? What kind of title is THAT to fight for? They are seriously getting desperate.**

**Review.**

* * *

CM Punk, the Junior Whopper approached the Wendy's drive-in menu with John Morrison, the Spicy Chicken.

_"Welcome to Wendy's, may I take your order?" _

"Yeah, can I have a Double Whopper, please?" CM Punk asked.

_"I'm sorry sir, this isn't Burger King. Would you like a baked potate with garlic sauce?"_

CM Punk was baffled. "A baked po--A baked--Are we in Russia?!"


End file.
